Welcome back, dear laptop.
On a Saturday morning about a month and a half ago, as I do in my usual morning routine, I checked my e-mail, then shut down my computer before heading to my morning class. Upon my return four hours later, my computer was still stuck on the blue shutdown screen, fan running rapidly. I knew something was not right.
In the course of the next week or so, I proceeded to download lots of antivirus software to combat what I thought was a virus. None of that worked, so I decided to take the tried and true step towards virus removal - reformatting the computer; erasing everything and starting over from the beginning. I read up on it on the Internet, and did it myself. About halfway through the process, I realized that wasn’t working, either. At the end of my rope, we enlisted the help of the DCU computer guy, Sasha, who confirmed that the problem was bigger than a virus. About this time, Sasha and his family emigrated to the U.S. and Valek took over computer operations at DCU. He took our laptop to a repair place and we promptly left for MCC retreat. Upon our return, it was waiting for us, ready to go, for the not-too-scary fee of 260 griven ($52). I’ve been told that there were two things wrong with it, neither of which I really understand. All that matters to me is that my laptop is again at my every beck and call for e-mail writing, lesson planning and skypeing.
As I caught up on a month of missed blog reading this evening, I couldn’t help mentally noting my gratitude for Sasha and Valek’s help in the computer situation. As we come to the end of our term, I realize that there are many things I have learned. But I also realize there is still much that I can’t do. When my computer, my main work tool and communication lifeline breaks in Donetsk, Ukraine, what to do? There are no certified HP service centers with smiling customer service representatives around the corner, or anywhere less than a day’s drive away. So then which computer repair shop to try? Just pick the first I see? Do I walk in myself, mumble around in half-coherent Russian and hope they don’t hear dollar bills in my accent and take this helpless foreigner to town? Of course not, I ask for help from competent people, and it is gladly given. It shouldn’t really be hard, but it is. I want to be the independent, self-sufficient American into which my culture shaped me. But while living in a foreign culture, speaking a foreign language, I’ve learned that I simply can’t. I need the help of others, and although I don’t like to, asking for help is a necessary part of living here.
This idea of independence was something I was aware of in myself before we arrived in Ukraine, but have since learned how important it is to me. My sense of independence makes me try absolutely everything I can before I ask for help. It also means that when things that I don’t know how to deal with happen, I freak out. I have an especially bad history with electronics, as Dave can attest to. For example, the time when a drunk fan hugged Dave at a soccer game and he dropped the camera (which broke). Or when he plugged the battery charger into the outlet without flipping the voltage switch from 110 to 220. A poof of black smoke and that was all for that charger cord. Both incidents occurred less than a month after we arrived in Ukraine, when stress levels were already high and the thought of grocery shopping on my own was hard enough, let alone getting a camera repaired. That was nearly unfathomable. Therefore, I am ashamed to admit that I didn’t react well.
Both items were fixed (with the help of a great friend) long ago. And I’m happier to admit that with my most recent computer episode, although there were short times of despair, in the end, there wasn’t too big of a scene. I admit, I am still not good at asking for help. But perhaps I’m improving. One thing I am certain of: I am very grateful for those who willingly do help me, as soon as I calm down, bite my tongue and ask.
Laura
